Ever wonder what it is like to know everything?
I feel like I know everything.
I could have whatever I wanted. I know how to get it.
I know what people want. They want to feel special.
And loved and admired. By something that is more beautiful, smart or more sucsessful then themselves.
Or they want to be around someone who embodies the person they wish they were.
To be this person to everyone is what wears me down.
To go home to people who are young. Dependant.
I want freedom.
I just want to live.
Im tired of seeing destruction- of seeing the future of destruction,.
To know what has to happen to this world before it can get better.
I am clean and I wonder why.
Cause I almost died? Cause I did die and was brought back to life?
Who knows.
But I am here and sober again and hating it again.
Not happy.
Never happy.
Beacsue I dont think I have ever looked someone- well maybe one person,
In the eyes that I thought could possibly begin to understand me.
